I remember my third grade field day. It was hot. I had an ugly yellow bear on my t-shirt. We ran relays and everyone screamed at me because I was so slow and we never won. Four years later I ran for student council on the platform that if I won, I would do away with field day. I lost.
What I should have said was, "vote for me and field day will be awesome!"
"You'll get to spend the whole day goofing off with your awesome friends and photo bombing the cool kids!"
"You get to pick up marbles in pools of water with your monkey toes and...."
"There will be bobbing for donuts. Krispy. Kreme. Donuts."
"Oh, and you sweet and silly teacher will play Just Dance Disney and boogie down to such classic songs as Squirrels in your Pants."
I could have had a career in politics. It could have been the beginning of my total world domination!